Weaponry: when you don't have options

Hey Thespis here to give you a crash course at weapons improv. In order to master the art of improv you need to be fast on your feet and be able to keep your wits about you. If you're being chased by a hoard of Zombies the last thing you want to do is panic and “choke” your brain. If you do you will lose your brain.... permanently. Some basic rules of weaponry improv are:

• Use your environment to your advantage, turn your surroundings against your opponents.

• When in doubt, turn about, and run !

• Anything has the potential to be a weapon if you can chuck it, swing it, shoot it or if you think you can do any of these things.

• Always leave the base with some weapons to reduce the amount of improv needed in an attack situation

Using your environment to your advantage

Zombies are not very agile or good on their feet, so try to knock stuff behind you and make a big mess for them to trip behind you ! Note throwing stuff in front of you is not recommended because you might trip. If you have trees or a wooded area run in there and try to lose them in the trees, tree branches also make great zombie whackers.Note roots may also cause zombies or yourself to trip so mind your feet. Have you heard the saying head for the hills ? Zombies are not fast runners when it comes to inclines also their knees don't work so well and they tend to have accidents while running down hill.

RUN !

Never ever stop if you have multiple zombies after you or if you have no weapons or a low supply of them. Keep moving until you lose them, they are all dead, or you find some back up.

Anything has the potential to be a weapon !

I was running from a hoard of zombies once and found myself at a junk yard at the top of a hill. The zombies were having a hard time making the incline so it gave me a second to think. I grabbed a big tire (I guess it was tractor tire. ) and a long metal pole. I rolled the tire near the edge of the hill,aimed right for the zombies, sat inside the tire, held the metal pole across my lap so about 4 to 5 foot of pole was sticking out either side of the tire, and I rolled down hill making a nice clean cut slicing the zombies legs right off. After a moment or two of disorientation I was able to see what I had done and run away before they could recover.

Never leave base without a weapon of some kind.

I know for a fact that during some reconnaissance missions and the like you can't go around with a rapier (My preferred sword.) sheathed at your hip, but at least have a hand gun or something concealable on your persons. Having a weapon on you keeps you so much safer and prepared than not having one at all. A nice long balanced stick makes a great quarterstaff that can at least offer you some protection while helping keep your distance. Lets face it not everyone is able to improv real well (its a sad fact of life and I pity them) so please people carry a weapon so your friends and team members won't have to write a nice tasteful eulogy about your unfortunate and untimely death.